December 2009
57 posts
1 tag
“I didn’t really think about death until Princess Diana died. That was the...”
– Kelly on The Office
Dec 31st
1 tag
The Office reruns
Jim: I'm not going to be asking for a raise, I'm actually going to be asking for a pay decrease.
Dwight: That is so stupid. What if he gives it to you?
Jim: Then I win.
Dec 31st
2 tags
“What part of “shorn’t” don’t you understand, Kevin?”
– Michael Scott
Dec 31st
3 tags
Dec 30th
2 tags
Dec 30th
361 notes
Dec 30th
179 notes
3 tags
FYI: I am one of those "humorless" feminists who...
sexismandthecity:(via tiredofbeingignored) OMG ME TOO, CRAZY
Dec 30th
6 tags
“I disagree with the use of the word “pussy” to describe a weak person. Because...”
– Hal Sparks (via bean22) (via sexismandthecity)
Dec 30th
542 notes
4 tags
Dec 30th
314 notes
If'n y'all ever want to submit a...
occultist: You may either go here: http://occultist.tumblr.com/submit - or e-mail your submission: occultist[AT]tumblr.com. * Stories need to be for real or at least sound convincing. UFO sightings, Bigfoot love-ins, ghost tales, all are good (though I’m particularly fond of folks’ personal or family ghost stories). If you make me just laugh my ass off I’ll probably post it, real or not. *...
Dec 30th
7 notes
Yeah, that's cool.
malfoyy: And I’m on Fuck No Ugly People of Tumblr. You know, if it was any other day, I probably would have shrugged and moved on, but after all the shit I’ve been getting, I fucking give up. Wait, that’s ridiculous, because you’re one of my favorite Qute Grrls of tumblr. People got no taste and no class on the internet sometimes.
Dec 30th
18 notes
1 tag
via Bash.org
Tostitos: I like my women the way I like my coffee.
Jet: Ground up and in the freezer?
SteveTheImpermeableHamster: Full of your cream?
Mistik: Hawt?
Dokterrock: What, tied up in a sack and thrown over the back of a burro?
RaMTuFF: Quiet ?
Jet: Colombian?
Aimee: Hot?
Jet: From McDonald's?
djswift2k3: Black?
SteveTheImpermeableHamster: In a cup?
Jet: Spilt all over your lap?
Aimee: Cheap?
whiteboihere: Strong and black?
Tostitos: I hate you all.
Dec 30th
Dec 30th
Dec 30th
Dec 22nd
13 notes
2 tags
Listeninothernews: just a friend | biz markie This...
Dec 19th
49 notes
2 tags
“You need a password to buy toe socks off of Amazon, but military intelligence?...”
– Rachel Maddow You know, she bugs the hell out of me sometimes with her one-sided commentary, but I’ll always come crawling back to the lovely and witty Ms. Maddow.
Dec 18th
Dec 18th
2 tags
draco malfoy stars in "the breakfast omegle."
omegleshit: Connecting to server… You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You: Cauldron Cakes with the crusts cut off. Stranger: ? You: Well, Neville, this is a very nutritious lunch. You: All the food groups are represented. Stranger: what You: Here’s my impression You: of life You: at big L’s house. Stranger: ..? You: SON? You: YEAH, DAD? You: HOW WAS YOUR DAY,...
Dec 17th
Dec 16th
7 notes
“I don’t want gay people looking at the site! can you do it with CSS3?”
– (via clientsfromhell) Well, that’s hilarious.
Dec 15th
124 notes
2 tags
“If you think you are sick of Joe Lieberman now, just wait until you get sick.”
– JIM SHEA, columnist, Hartford Courant (via the New York Times) (via inothernews)
Dec 15th
33 notes
4 tags
“Whereas, take Mary, whose only superpower was having not had sex yet. As the...”
– Meadowsweet & Myrrh
Dec 12th
2 tags
Welcome to New Jersey: We've heard every joke, so...
Dickhead: You know why the seagulls fly upside down in New Jersey? Because there's nothing worth shitting on! Hahaha.
Edie: Are you serious? I am standing right here.
Dickhead: You can make fun of my home state if you want.
Edie: But I wouldn't do that, because I'm nicer than that, you asshole.
Dec 11th
I'm too sensitive for Formspring.
gamesockson: If someone said something mean, I would cry. So I will ask myself questions and then answer them. Me: Do you like tacos? Me: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING I LOVE THEM THEY ARE FANTASTIC. Me: Soft or hard shell? Me: Crunchy crunchy tacos!!! Me: What are your favorite ingredients? Me: I like ground beef and lots of cheese and gauc and sour cream and pico de gallo and hot sauce. I...
Dec 10th
“A future in which privacy would face constant assault was so alien to the...”
– Bruce Schneier (via azspot)
Dec 9th
7 notes
Dec 9th
homocomix: Google Wave has finally reached homocomix! I’m at homocomix@googlewave.com I have a few invitations, does anybody want one, just to see how it works? I would love an invite, actually, if you have one to spare. It sounds interesting.
Dec 9th
3 notes
1 tag
Dec 8th
2,949 notes
Dec 8th
6 notes
Dec 8th
263 notes
1 tag
Dec 7th
Dec 7th
159 notes
“I was telling [Mel Brooks] that I went to see Blazing Saddles when I was 10. And...”
– President Obama (via meredithnyc) (via apsies) (via andrewmcclain) (via gamesockson)
Dec 7th
36 notes
Dec 7th
47 notes
Dec 7th
697 notes
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS
MY BFFF FROM HIGH SCHOOL IS ON TUMBLR HOLY SHIT I am so friggin’ excited. Everyone follow Jaine!
Dec 7th
“Once a movement becomes an institution, it is lost.”
– Jacques Ellul (via azspot)
Dec 7th
9 notes
Dec 7th
73 notes
TRUTH: Cheese and crackers taste best in bed.
Dec 7th
Dec 7th
3,370 notes
rosasparks: giantevilhead: rosasparks: giantevilhead: I need to get something for negative reinforcement… maybe a squirt bottle. It doesn’t work on the kittens. In fact, yesterday Mr. Pibb attacked the squirt bottle and ran off with it in his teeth. It probably won’t work with the wee one, either. Air horn, perhaps? Add a bit of vinegar to the water. That pisses them off really good....
Dec 7th
Dec 7th
72 notes
Dec 6th
Dec 6th
Dec 6th
16 notes
3 tags
Dec 5th
383 notes
Dec 5th
157 notes
2 tags
Dec 5th
3 tags
Dec 4th
36 notes